Lucius

I’m sorry LOL (He’s gonna hate this). Lucius is an artist and I was obsessed with Terrence Howard and his character Lucius Lyons on Empire. I’ll call him Lu though. This one is long because it’s been a month long show.

I’ve had a crush on Lu for months. He was performing at one of my favorite spots and I went up and complimented him on his music. He’s 90s fine. Like he’d be a love interest on Sister, Sister or Smart Guy. Of course I was going to flirt. Funny enough, that night I find out he’s one of my favorite cousin’s friends. He invites me and my cousins to his next show and I’m giddy but bummed because I have a family commitment. We switch IGs and I take the interest in full stride.

He’s laid back and seems quieter than me so I’m not surprised he’s not… chasing me. It’s fine, I start liking his stories and responding and we go back and forth a bit. It’s all very surface level and friendly but I’m invested. I’m going to all his shows. At least the ones on the weekends for a couple weeks. And I know I have a crush because I cannot look this man in the eyes and I’m a little speechless. I’m cheesing like a fool. One of these shows, there’s a girl sitting alone. I’m thinking, she’s a dedicated fan! You can imagine my heart dropping when he finishes his set, goes over, and they kiss. Right in front of me!

My head whips to my cousin. “So you couldn’t tell me he had a girlfriend?” I’m plum with embarrassment because they know I’m crushing on him and I’ve been shamelessly very enthusiastic in his DMs (about his music, please).

“Oh he’s dating. I don’t know if that’s his girl like that but you know how it is.” He says. I internally take 30 steps back, immediately finish my drink, and call one of my exes to pick me up. Because nothing soothes a bruised ego like an ex that’s going to fawn over you.

Months go by and I hadn’t gone to another show. He replied to one of my IG stories about some holiday alcoholic concoction one of my friends made me and he says he’s got to try it. This spawns into a conversation about restaurants and him extending an invite to his next show. It then evolves into saying we should go to one of those restaurants after the holiday. It’s not a flat out request for a date but I can take a hint. I’m assuming he must be single or why would he be trying now? We back in the game!

He’s performing on a Wednesday. I make sure I do my hair prettily and find an outfit that’s casually hot but doesn’t look like I’m trying too hard. (That’s like the best part about dating right? The dressing up!) I show up with my cousins. One of them is teasing me about him and I’m trying not to watch with rapt attention. I’m swaying around and singing when he plays my favorite song of his. The drinks are flowing and the venue is filled with laughter. His set ends and I have some liquid courage so I start flirting.

“What are you drinking? I’ll grab it.” I say. (Look at me, buying the first drinks, who am I?)

“No, I’ll buy you one because you came out. You can pick mine though, help me expand my palate and all.” He grins. Oh, he has no idea. I pick a drink he really likes and we head back over to our group. We just end up in a little bubble talking. He says he needs some inspiration and needs to get out of the house. And well, we know I never sit still. There’s no one more perfect for the job than me. Time is just floating on by until I get fiercely hungry. He says he knows where I can get some dinner this late.

My cousins, while they may not be the best wingmen, they held it down for me that December night. They sat at the bar while Lu and I sat side by side in a booth, planning a day together. We did not call it a date. I can’t necessarily remember what was said that night, I just know I left the bar swooning. Woke up the next morning with a hangover so crazy, I teared up. Worth it.

We had exchanged numbers and since then, Lu and I have texted every single day. We talk about everything and nothing; there was just an instant friendship. Lu put a big emphasis on that too. “Checking in on my new friend, HB” “You’re my type of friend.” “I’m really happy we’re developing this friendship.” I started to get discouraged and confused! I’m thinking “Am I really reading into this wrong?” Who plans out a whole day together and it’s not actually a date? My cousin tells me to relax and just go with it. All will reveal itself in due time.

I’ve been into architecture lately so I suggested we head to Frank Lloyd Wright’s house. Maybe he’d be inspired there. He grabbed the tickets and we went. I don’t usually get nervous on first dates and this wasn’t a date so why were there butterflies? We took a self guided tour that I tried my best to pay attention to but he was so close and smelled good and was cracking jokes. We spent about an hour and a half giggling through the museum. He thanked me for having such a unique idea and stating how much he needed this. He felt refreshed. We were hungry so we headed downtown and I decided to surprise him after dinner. Everyone knows when I get the urge to surprise someone or start buying gifts, I’m down bad.

Seeing as how Lu is a producer and his life is colored by music, I thought he’d love James Hood’s Beautifica exhibit at the AZ Science Center. I surprise him with tickets. I’m thinking it’s going to be this wonderful, vividly picturesque experience that’s gonna make him want to create music videos and make a song about me. What a perfectly tailored idea, right? LOL. We both dozed off. Even though I had made my own playlist, the planetarium is so outdated the graphics were dusty. I can see him yawning from the corner of my eye and I’m begging myself to not snore obnoxiously. Ever the gentleman, he was still really appreciative and he asked if he could buy me a drink. I’m not gonna turn that down.

We start bar hopping (Pour Bastards has the most daunting menu but every drink was really amazing, check it out) and now we can really talk. We’re reflecting on the year, what we’d like life to look like in the next one, our passions, our exes. It’s all really just effortless and I find myself getting a soft spot for him. He’s just incredibly sweet and speaks with such thoughtfulness. He’s an old soul; he’s definitely been here before. It’s at the last bar I realize he’s not going to make a move and yeah, he was serious about this friend thing. Lucky for him, I’m a great friend to have. Now that I know where the boundary is, I can shelve all romantic inclination and focus on that. That’s probably for the best since we’re in the same friend group now.

The next couple of weeks we’re seeing each other once a week. He’ll meet me at some bar and we’ll stay and talk for hours until they close. It’s all friendly and just getting to know each other. So what if he says I’m attractive and alludes to me as his current muse. It’s normal for your friends to call you amazing every day or tell me that everything pales in comparison to me. Friends do that.

He knows I love to read. On his birthday he wrote me a story. I was so touched because he was so thoughtful with it and I was extremely entertained. And let me be honest, I was also turned on because the thought of you celebrating me on your day just strokes my ego. He had mentioned it would be nice if he could see me on his birthday. Little did he know, I was already planning to surprise him at his birthday dinner with his coworkers. I’d show up towards the end of it, tell him I was at the bar and offer to buy him dessert.

I miscalculated the timing and showed up after appetizers. I had to let him know now.

“HB, you look beautiful. I’m not even going to beat around the bush right now.” Okay fair. He did look incredible in his suit.

“Well thank you, you look handsome too.” I grin.

“Do you want to join us?” He asked. The dress I was wearing was not work appropriate. Besides he hadn’t looked at me like that before, I didn’t want to share him just yet.

“No thank you. I’ll just sit at the bar and have a drink. Go ahead and finish up and when you’re done we’ll get out of here. I’ll take you to one of my favorite bars.” His smile lights up the room.

“Okay. I’ll text you. This is an amazing surprise, thank you.”

I take him to Century Grand and I crack some joke about him not being able to take a hint.

“Have you been dropping hints?” He asked. I guffaw.

“Why are you laughing?” He asked.

“Oh, you’re being serious?” I retorted.

“Yeah, what do you mean?” His face completely sincere. I take a swig of my drink and decide to just be straight up.

“Yeah, since the moment I met you. The DMs, the showing up to your shows, the science center. But then you kept emphasizing that we were friends, I didn’t think you were interested in anything more. I didn’t want to cross any lines and I’m happy with that! We have a great time.” I said in a rush. He shook his head and groaned. Admitting that he had a feeling but he’s a little oblivious (blind) when it comes to that. He said our last couple times hanging out had felt like dates. I’m sitting there trying not to cheese because this feels like a movie.

“All that to say, can I take you on a real date?” He asks. Of course, I kiss him yes. Who knew those lips would have me floating like I had just taken four shots of rum?

I’ll be traveling for work so I won’t see him for a week. I’m daydreaming like crazy and trying to have some patience. Hell, I might just ask him to pick me up from the airport and say screw a formal date. One day at a time!